To all the moms out there, I hope you had a wonderful weekend and got to do whatever makes you happy. I lost my mom back in 1997, so the holiday is always a mix bag of emotions for me. I am grateful for my fur kids and the opportunity to provide them a healthy and happy life. Yet, I always find my heart longing to talk to my mom just one more time. I learned a lot from her, and I want to share what’s been on my mind lately.
As usual, I will reference a movie to illustrate my point. Movies are multi-dimensional and often are a more profound example than words alone allow. Let’s go back to 2009 when the Star Trek film debuted a reboot of the popular television series. The gist is all hell has broken lose! The captain has been captured and Spock is in command. James T. Kirk is actually on the ship illegally as they all watch Spock’s planet being destroyed.
Kirk is kicked off the ship and finds himself on a frozen planet where he meets the older Spock who is shocked that Kirk is not the captain. The entire universe has been altered, thus the term “reboot.” Nothing is as it should be, and Spock informs Kirk that he must right things by becoming captain of the Enterprise. He is to accomplish this by proving Spock is emotionally compromised. It is here that I want us to pay close attention. Kirk asks how can he emotionally compromise the younger Spock, and Spock replies “He just saw his planet destroyed. Trust me, he is emotionally compromised.”
This line has been rattling around in my brain as I live out yet another stressful time in my own life. Friends know our circumstance, yet, many don’t bother offering encouragement. I am grateful for a few close friends who get it and have been our rock, but even our own church went silent when I asked for words of encouragement to be emailed to me…any word. I got crickets. Not a single person took two seconds to send something that requires only a few minutes of time, not money. This isn’t how we are supposed to behave.
We are failing miserably as a society to love one another. Oh, we like to talk about it and post sayings about being a better person, but when push comes to shove, we do nothing. I personally believe the fear of COVID-19 has pushed people more inward toward selfishness than ever before. It is all about self-preservation and screw everyone else. Time to get our heads out of our butts and realize that other people might just need a friend. If you are a Christian, God needs to work through His people. Time to behave better!
Similar to what Spock said, trust me people are emotionally compromised who are unemployed! You don’t have to wonder about it – they are freaking out and praying to God they don’t become a statistic and end up on the streets. People who have lost loved ones are NOT okay. They are grieving and hurting. No wondering required! Those with health problems are definitely discouraged and could use some encouragement. Quite wondering and DO something!
My mom was a giver and instilled this in me. No matter what was going on in our own lives, we were kind and thoughtful to others. I am grateful she taught me how to be considerate of others, but I wish more people learned this lesson. None of us should ever pass up the opportunity to let someone know we are thinking of them. Life is way too short to keep this to yourself, wait for the perfect time or when it is convenient for you. Pick up the phone! Email! Send a card! Better yet, GIVE to those in need. Don’t assume silence means everything is fine because it usually means the opposite.
If you don’t know how a friend is doing, shame on you. You haven’t been a very good friend. Worse is when you do know what is going on but choose to do nothing. I’m pretty sure you have a bag full of excuses, but they are just that – lame excuses for not thinking beyond yourself. The good news is you can change that right now! Life is hard, and we need each other. Let’s all be better at putting our money where our mouth is because it is easy to say “I’ll walk this journey with you” when you don’t offer even a listening ear. Here’s to human kindness and applying the lesson my mom taught me.
PS A great start would be getting a friend in need my book, A Healthier, Happier You! with 101 ways for them to lessen their stress.